Forever to Come

Im still delighted every time I remember how our love story started. When After a month of chatting and emailing you decided to visit me, after few weeks you arrived in the Philippines to pursue your pure intentions and court me. After two days I gave my sweetest "YES" and kissed you first. LOL. After two weeks we parted, and after four months we see each other again and got engaged and started processing my papers going here. After two weeks you come home to your homeland again and after four months again we reunited and got approved from USCIS. After six months we got approved from USEM  in Manila and a month after I flew going here for us to finally live together for good.

September 12,2010 when I got in US, after one day, September 14, 2010, we got married in Las Vegas, Nevada. That was one of my happiest days. Now we already have our own small family. I am always thankful to God and feel blessed to have you and Calvin in my life. 

Five years of being together, four years of being married.. Time flies.. Still, I am looking forward to more years to celebrate with you.. Happy Anniversary my love!  And forever to come! I love you always!

Her Friendship Warms My Heart

I was so vulnerable that time. As I remember I was so shy and sensitive. Bullying is my constant companion from 1st grade to high school. I cry easily. But I make sure after that I smile again. I am a quiet type of person, the reason why I only have few friends. My childhood life wasn't as happy as the other, but every year of it have left a mark in my heart, that I still cherished until now. Most specially those person who become a part of it, become a buddy even in a short time.

I cant really remember now how did we first met. One thing I remember, she become my competitor in the 4th grade. There was a time that our teacher still needs to give us a special test just to know who will be on the top 3 in the class. She may be my opponent in the class but somehow she became my friend. We didn't argue about those things. We still smile and laugh even the other got the highest score. We still borrow stuff, and look forward for another day where we could share ideas in one particular assignments. I value her as a companion. Such a precious person.

Few weeks ago she found me in the social media (Facebook). She didn't know I was looking for her too, I was shocked when I saw her picture again, after 22 long years. Lots of things has changed between us, but everything flashed back in my mind when I saw her again. One thing that I was grateful too, she also found her soul mate overseas. Wishing her lots of love and luck, and praying that God continue to bless us wherever life may leads us. Her friendship warms my heart. 

I am back!!!! Hugs!!!!!

Hey, here I am again, after almost two years I come back and ready to get my blog kikkin' again! Anyway's here is the link of the video of my lovely family, having our new addition, our son..

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8A0_2wN2NM8&list=UUEvE85-AVgFWCQBqyL5V30A

Have a very nice day. And May God's blessings be with us always!

The Journey of My Pregnancy

Two Months - Having nausea, dizziness, and luck of energy to do my everyday activities in the house. Cravings for filipino foods. The normal things that I love to do before is what I hate now. I hate to smell things that I love to smell before, like garlic, boiling of rice, and popcorn and even my husbands armpit, LOL Have a sleepless nights sometimes. Tired and always sleepy.

Three Months - The nausea attack just once in a while, more dizziness, cravings for lots of food, eat more than usual and still have sleepless night and always sleepy in the afternoon.

Four Months - Allergy occurs, back aches, light headedness

Five Months - Back aches, lower abdominal pain, head aches.

Six months - Enjoying every single day, though my tummy is getting heavier and heavier.

Seven months - In this picture, I am really trying hard to find clothes that still fit yet  comfortable to me. I am too tired to go shopping for maternity clothes, but I am always whining about getting one. LOL

Eight months - I was rushed to the ER. I slipped and fall in my butt. Hysterically crying while calling my husband who's  that time doing grocery shopping. Went to the bathroom and looked at my underwear if there's blood, I felt relieved when I found none. They've done ultrasound and different test on me, Thank God everything was normal. But after that night I already got lots of contractions. The doctor advised me not to walk too far and stand too long. Feel nervous every time I feel pain coz I know its not time for him to go out yet. Praying hard, and holding on each day.

Eight months - Getting closer. Calvin is holding on because mommy wont let her go out yet. Everything seems going on the right track. Getting more excited too see our baby. Few more weeks and the waiting is over. Thank God for the guidance everyday.

A Sweet Expectations

Its been nine months since we have decided to stop taking birth control and start working on having a baby. We were so excited. Planning a family makes our mind busy and our hearts full of joy.

Three weeks ago when I found out that the long wait is over. That morning, after having a weird dreams of my husband being childish and silly, I get up and go to the bathroom, but before peeing, at the corner of my eye saw the pregnancy test kit sitting in the cover, it was not my plan to take a pregnancy test but I did! I just cant believe that after I put down the PT kit at the corner of the tub two lines appeared in just a span of minutes. My eyes widened and hurriedly raise my shirt up and feel my tummy, "I am pregnant!" I uttered with a big grin.

That exact time I really don't know what to do. I called my husband right away who was at work. He was so happy to hear the good news. That day, our call and text messages was filled with i love you's.

As the day goes by, having some changes in my body makes me feel delighted. Having a supportive husband makes everything easy. Our journey to becoming a parent is starting already. And I will make sure cherish all the moments when..


- when we hugged so tight after the doctor's confirmed that its positive.
- when we first call ourselves mommy and daddy and giggles.
- when he first feel my tummy and give sweet kisses.
- when after so many months again, he open and close the passenger door for me, haha, missed those!
- when we go to the restaurant to get my cravings.
- when my tummy receives good morning and good night kisses from my husband.
- when every time I crave for something and my husband cant give it, he just stare at me with disappointment and gave my tummy a tender kisses.
- when I crave for something for lunch and crave for something else for dinner.
- when I just stare to the food and taste a little so that my husband will not get disappointed after bringing it from the place 5 miles away.
- when I first throw up early in the morning.
- when i started to feel dizzy and not feeling good.

Today, the little angel in my tummy turns two months already. I know going through this period of pregnancy is not gonna be easy. But like all moms out there who have gone through this, I will surpass it too and will try to enjoy every moment of it.

I truly thank God for giving me a chance to carry an angel and be one flesh and blood for nine months. Its a wonderful feeling. I prayed that He will take care of me as much as the baby every seconds of the day. This precious gift will be blessed with so much love every single day. Thank you dear Lord for granting our prayers. Its indeed a sweet expectations. :)

God will make us stronger..

There's no such things as a perfect marriage, you'll gonna go through ups and downs, mood swings will irritate you, but always remember, with the power of Love and the guidance of God, you will surpass every negativity. Always look at your wife/husband like you first saw him/her, with a big grin of smile. Always treat her like you're still in the courting stage, where you always do everything just to make her smile, and always do surprises for him just to let him know that he is appreciated. The problems and circumstances will make your marriage stronger, will make you love him/her more each and every day of your life. Trust and understand each other as God always do, He trust us more again and again after understanding us from making mistakes over and over! .. Spread the love everyone! :)

Have been thinking...

Hmm... I really don't know what to say, (laugh out loud). Actually I just visit my blog and browse a little. Its been a while since I checked my blog, and I'm happy of finding that there's still lots who follow it (salamat naman!). I've been thinking also. I've had a conversation with a good friend last night about something that I love to do but for some reason I stopped from doing it. She's been convincing me to do those things again and give my self another chance to fulfill what I really wanted to do since I was a child. I admit I am having a second thought already. I am having hard time doing such things already. I really wanted to do that again but my mindset is not capable of doing it no more, hahahaha! But maybe one day I'll go back again. Maybe one day I will find my innermost self again, who you can just leave in one corner with paper and pen and play with imaginations again. Who is excited to sleep and wake up with a beautiful dreams that ready to put on papers. Who is inspired to jot down every single sweet moments she sees just to use in future love story manuscript... Maybe one day I'm gonna fall in-love again... to my first love... writing.

STILL by Brian Mcnight

This song always reminds me of my first manu script that I've done for Precious Hearts Romance pocket book. The whole story was inspired of this song, where after many years of waiting to find the girl (Daphne) he still want her and love her.
Neo was a retired ramp model who wants to live life simpler from the glamorous life style. While Daphne from being one and only daughter of a business man, live and follow her dream to be a famous ramp model too the time when Neo wasn't a part of a prestigious world anymore. Their lives cross when Daphne visit a famous resort in Palawan where Neo was having a vacation too. That started their love story and how Daphne destined to find the guy who shows love and care the first time they've met.
STILL (A jacket and a letter) is a story I formed from my dreams. Where every night I am excited to sleep and think of beautiful things that turns to a wonderful fantasy, put those together pieces to pieces, to become a love story book. I am proud I made it! Thank you God for the gift of talent! :D

A Valentine Drama

Its 10:35 PM at the clock in my car. I supposed to be in the house right now, having my late dinner while playing FB, taking a rest after a long tiring day at work. Saw the phone lighten up, it was ringing for the 4th time, my husband is calling me again. I know he's worried now but instead of answering it, I just hold it tightly, look up at the dark sky, then tears falls down again from my eyes, run through my cheeks, wiped it and whisper to God, "I'm sorry" and cried again.
There's just a few car in the parking lot, the silence of the night makes me feel sad more so I tune up the radio, love songs we're playing, so volume it down, I don't wanna go home yet, I just want to be alone for a while. Holding the steering wheel, with my face on my arm, facing the right side of the parking lot, a familiar person appears. You can tell on his face that he's so worried. He hurriedly open the passenger door of my car and get in. After a small talk and kisses I was convinced to finally go home... Its really hard when you're trying to be good with somebody and yet that somebody wont bother to give it back in return. You're trying hard to reach out to meet their expectation but all they see is your imperfections. I guess its time to move on. Pleasing everyone will be now out of my dictionary.
12:05, still up. Its been two nights already that I doesn't have enough sleep. Its been a stressful day for me. But I know I still have to be grateful, because I have this person with me who is always there on my ups and down. Who always willing to listen on my drama's in life. Laugh and accept my craziness, spoil me in everything and love me more than words can say. Thank you God for allowing me to meet this person, thank you for giving him to me, to love him and be with him for the rest of my life. I know there's still plenty of circumstances to come, but I am confident that I will surpass them all with him by my side.
God, thank you for unconditional and forever love to us. Hugs! :)

Romance is more important than you may think

In order for the love to thrive, not just survive,
it needs a protective environment.
We call it romance,
and it is as necessary to love
as the air we breathe is to living.
Love cant exist in a vacuum.
It needs more than two individuals
staring blankly at each other.
For love to grow, the two people need to communicate.
The sounds, smell, sights, and touches
that are the main ingredients of love
must somehow be passed back and forth
between two lovers.
Romance is the medium
for this transferal.

Some people think romance is corny. It's not-- it's necessary. Others, especially some men, think romance is somehow demeaning. But being romantic doesn't make a man less of a man. It makes him more of one.
Love can be hard to put into words, but in the form of a bouquet of flowers, it can never be misunderstood. Love in the form of taking on some household chore can't be miscommunicated. Love that's is accompanied by the words "I'm sorry" will never be rejected. Love in the form of focusing your total attention on your partner for a few minutes or a few hours, even when there's something else you'd rather be doing, will speak volumes.

TIP:
Some people are confused about romance and think it can be bought. While money may be able to help create a romantic atmosphere, romance itself doesn't ever have a price tag attached to it, nor can it be wrapped in a box from Tiffany's. It just needs to be a significant part of you: a thought, a block of time, a sympathetic ear, some warm arms, the pressure of a back rub, the flutter of a kiss. Love needs to nestle in the cocoon of romance. You don't need threads of gold or silver to weave your own safe haven for love. All that's required is a small part of yourself.

Let your bedroom be the sanctuary for your love

For love to flourish,
it needs a special place
where its not competing
for time and space.

It may feel extreme
to consider it hallowed ground,
but if your bedroom is not
the sanctuary for your love,
then where else is?

Your bedroom is the one room in your house that deserves the certain respect because it bears silent witness to and shelters your love.

If you love all the mystery from within those four walls, you'll be weakening the fabric of the bond you're trying to build.

If the door is never shut, or if it doubles as a work room, children's playroom, exercise area, TV viewing place, or snack bar, how can opportunities arise for spontaneous signs of affection?

Try to think of your bedroom as a garden, and put up a fence to protect your little seedlings of love and give them a better chance to grow.

TIP:
If space limitations leave you no choice but to have your bedroom double as something else, then at least put some time limits on these activities. Remember, cuddling is just as important as paying bills, and far superior to watching the evening news.

Look your partner in the eyes

Maybe that's how it began.
You were across the room
and your eyes met.

Soon you communicated with words
and with your bodies,
but it was your eyes that made
the first contact.

Eye contact is vital in every relationship. When spoken into space, the words "I love you" lose half their meaning-- maybe even all of it. (Unless you're on the phone, of course.) Its when you say words while looking into your lovers eyes that they mean the most.

Your eyes can express feelings that words cannot. When your eyes say "I missed you," "I adore you," "I'm angry with you," or "I trust you," your partner knows how your really feel with or without words. And when you use your eyes with your words, they add an emphasis that cant be missed.

So try to spent time each day looking to each other's eyes. You'll be expressing yourselves in a way that words cannot duplicate.

TIP:
If your partner cant look you in the eyes, there's another type of message being communicated. Don't ignore such a sign, but try to get to the bottom of it. The earlier you spot trouble in a relationship and make repairs, the easier it will be.

Make sure your words and actions are in sync

Sometimes words get in the way.
Sometimes they don't say enough.
Sometimes they get stuck in the back of your throat.
But just because your tongue is tied
doesn't mean you're cut off from each other.

Its really great to say those magical three words, "I love you," but there are many ways to let your loved one know how you feel.

You can say an awful lot with a look, a touch, a smile, a frown, a thoughtful gesture, a shrug, a favorite meal, a changed diaper, a silently paid bill, a remembered anniversary, or a bouquet of flowers.

You can also communicate negative thoughts in these silent ways, like leaving your dirty socks on the floor or not calling to say you'll be home late. Sometimes such thoughtlessness is only carelessness, though even then there's an unspoken message.

So let your loved know how you feel, whats in your heart, and whats in your mind... in words and in gestures.

TIP:
If you're careful how you choose your words, be just as careful in the gestures that you make. Just because nobody hears the tree falling in your forest of love, the effect of the thud will still be felt.

Really mean it when you say "I love you"

As the song said, love is all around us.
But while there may be hearts beating out their tunes
of love all around you,
deciphering the rhythms can be oh-so difficult.
And nothing makes us quite so tongue-tied
as putting our feelings into words.

Emotions are meant to be felt,
heartstrings to be tugged,
shoulders to be caressed,
lips to be kissed.
Our brains, our personal computers,
can process just so much.
So when feelings are running high,
be careful that the words don't get in the way.



One stumbling block to communicating love is that the very word "love" has so many meanings. Saying "I love you" to your partner is a world apart from announcing "I love Rocky Road" at the ice cream parlor. Your heart strings are not pulled the same way by your lover as they are by your children. The love you feel from one of your children is unlike the love you feel from another one of your children or for your grandchild. And then there's a love of God, of country, and of thy neighbor.

With such a cloud of meanings surrounding this small word, its no wonder that making our feelings known can be such a difficult task.

TIP:
One way to make the word "love" stand for romantic love is to qualify it with a two-letter word: "in." When you say you're "in love" with someone, it means more than simply saying you love them. So if you really want to be clear to your partner, every once in a while, tell them or write to them that you're "in love" with them.
You could even say "I'm so in love with you." That two letter qualifier will mean a lot to them.

Swallow your pride and say sorry!

Admit it, its the one of the hardest thing to do. Maybe your mind is telling you to say it but its just so hard to mention it, and even you've finally mention it, its still hard to admit it, that... yeah, you're sorry, that you're wrong, and that your immaturity attacked you once again... Its really hard to swallow your pride...

Me and my husband had a little discussions about something that he bought today. I'm expecting that it'll be nice looking, but it annoys me how it looked like when we picked it up. I get disappointed a little because he still bought it even though I really don't like it. From the 20 minutes of ignoring him, finally he started to ask whats happening in me when we arrived at the house(that's me, whenever I'm mad I just want to be silent, well that's better than to nag I think.) He started to say every positive reason why he decided to bought it, and that time I just don't want to listen. But suddenly I realize, after I utter the prayer for the meal that night, that, why am I acting like this? I should be thankful and happy that finally we had this stuff after waiting and praying for it. I should be thanking God for this blessings that even though its not really good looking its a big help for the both of us. I felt ashamed to myself, and started to whisper to God that "I'm sorry". I've been childish again for wanting a beautiful toy even though it will not gonna give you or help you in so many ways. There, I talk to my husband again, embrace him and kiss him and say sorry. I hate it when immaturity sneaks up on me sometimes.

Sometimes you have to swallow your pride for everything to get better. Even if its too hard to accept your fault and it hurts. When you feel like you're wrong there's no reason to hold on to it. Saying sorry makes your feel at ease and meaning it means lots specially to the one who loves you and willing to give everything just for your own sake.

Oh God, make me a person you wanted me to be. Let me see things the way you wanted me to see. I'm not perfect, but at least I'm trying to be good as I can be... Give me your wisdom, your mercy, and blessings with each and every passing day, the guidance we needed and you alone to stay...

When your mate wants to talk do you listen?

When your mate wants to talk do you listen? Listening is one of the most important thing in building a good and last relationship. Whatever your partner wants to say something, even if its just a story telling about sports, news, or about his/her work experience for that day or just a none sense talk, its important that you extend your ear to him/her and listen. Listening means giving your attention to others even the topic is interesting or not. I'm sure you will get annoyed too if you talk and talk while no one's listen.

My husband and I have a good communication and listening skills. Whenever he got home from work, I always asked him, how is he and how's his day? Then he start to talk and I just listen. Sometimes the answer is just brief but the important thing is you listen. Often times, before we sleep, while laying down to bed, we make a conversations about everything. A laugh and exchanging ideas are a proof that you both listening and enjoying it. It is mostly needed to avoid misunderstanding that leads to quarrels and sometimes ends to a broken relationship.

Listening is not just important when somebody is saying a happy thoughts. It is more important when you listen to someone who is under a difficulty. That way you can share whats in your mind, that could help them on their dilemma.

There are saying that, "Being a talker doesn't mean you are a clever. An intelligent person do lots of listening than talking."

Our God listen and always willing to listen whatever you want to tell Him or wherever you wanted to say it. The reason why there's an answered prayer because He hears it, He listen. The same thing He wanted us to do. Listen! :)

Homesick

When a friend decided to go back in the Philippines from working abroad, everybody was astonished. Everyone knows that she's been out of the country for only two months, she has a good employer in Singapore, and she has a very good salary. What went wrong? Why did she preferred to go back and stay to her own family though they are still struggling from deep poverty?

"I missed my family!" I still cant forget the way she said that, no doubts, no regrets at all.

Homesick defines for acutely longing for one's family or home... For sure that's what she meant. And I think I'm struggling with that feeling too at this moment...

When I decided to went here (USA) I know I'm gonna miss my family, my home. Actually I am ready to face it, but I didn't know it'll gonna be this kind of pain, I miss them terribly...

For many years of existing, this is my first time to be apart from them (as in million miles apart). Maybe that's the reason why until now, I'm still not get used of it. Living in a quiet place right now is far from the place where I used to live for 28 years. Its peaceful yet it seems more disrupting. The stillness sometimes makes you go insane! Plus being different from the way you look (color of hair and skin), and you talk, sometimes frustrating. Yeah I am an alien in the place where I prefer to be with the man I hooked up.

Its not that I have regrets of getting here. First of all no one's provoke me to went here, just my own self. Its my own will to be with the man I truly love and its a pleasure to be with him forever. My husband is a gift from heaven, and he loves me as much as I love him, he cares as much as I care, and he feel the way I feel. He always makes me smile and laugh... He is a truly blessing... But we must admit, the happiness that your husband can give is different from the happiness that your family could give. Maybe it has the same amount but its different, its just different... I just wish we could live this life together, more closer, I bet it would be more joyful and pleasant.

"God, make me a stronger person as you want me to be. Make me appreciate more every little things that you gave me. Be with me always and hold my hands as I tread the winding road of life. May you guide and bless me always and forever!"... I've uttered this simple prayers as I stopped and closed my eyes...

I realize God never failed to planned your own happiness. We have to celebrate life with gratefulness because even we're all far apart , there is the Lord who is there to cheer you up and become your family.

Do I have to be somebody to be cool?

I am a person who easily appreciate how beautiful and kind a person is. I am a person who could easily get along even if you are a Richy rich, in a middle class or none of the two. I love fashion and even I don't afford all the latest fashion trends, I could make my own fashion statement, well maybe just not as cool as the others.

I appreciate how Lady Gaga do her style, weird but cool! Or Taylor Swift sweet and innocent look. They are all famous, and as I noticed even in shopping malls or in a small streets, if they saw you wears a cool clothes, or stuffs, lots people will like you, and some might wanted to be your friend... I admit I love making friends and would love to have lots of friends. But do I have to be like them to attract people? to be noticeable? Do I have to be somebody to be cool?

Hmm... I don't know, but one thing I'm certain, I love me, I love being myself!

As I remember, even in my youngest days, I never tried to be somebody. Becoming a fan of some people is good but I think trying to replicate them is unpleasant (respect to others who disagree!)... God made us in our own unique special way. You might wonder why your husband love you even if you're not very pretty and sexy, and even you look like "tindera sa palengke", hehehe... Most people judge you the way you look but I still believe if you take off your mask and let people see what you wanted them to see you, more and more people will appreciate you.

Don't try to live your life trying hard to become someone so that someone will love you back. In fact someone will love you back when you start loving your self. Indeed no one will love you forever just your own, because you alone could stay for yourself when everybody couldn't.

So start saying "I love me, cause Jesus loves me!". :)